My father does not want “a stranger” in the house. How do you handle reluctant parents?

First of all, I work with adult children to help them appreciate that the reluctance of their parent does not relieve them of their responsibility to do their best in caring for their mother or father. You cannot walk away from a potentially unsafe situation just because a parent is initially reluctant to try something new. Second, we stay with our clients; we hold their hands, if you will, through the transition process. If we are recommending that home care workers be brought in for assistance with activities of daily living, we assist in the transition to new faces and new routines. We understand the importance of bonding and building trust, and we are part of that process.

Where do you find the caregivers you recommend for providing home based services?

We work only with home care companies that are members of the California Association of Health Services at Home (www.cahsah.org). We neither recommend nor work with private caregivers. In this way, we can feel confident that professional screening and monitoring of performance are occurring.

Will Medicare or long term care insurance policies cover your services?

Medicare currently does not cover geriatric care manager services. And it is rare that a LTC insurance policy covers our services. But we are beginning to see such coverage appear in newer policies. And , most importantly, we are most aware of the other coverage questions and issues that might arise in health insurance policies generally and under Medicare, for example, how many days of rehabilitation a person is entitled to after a hospitalization, and we are able to both initiate claims and assist in appealing denials of coverage. Working with the insurance process is one of our many strengths.

My siblings and I are not on the same page when it comes to caring for our mother – can you help us?

And your family situation is not unique! We are strong believers in Family Meetings, and we are skilled in facilitating such conversations among siblings. and step siblings. Drawing people out, identifying each person’s strengths, allocating responsibilities – these are some of the goals we pursue during these meetings.

My parents’ finances are a mess – do you handle money issues?

Part of our initial assessment when we first work with our clients includes a section on finances. Are bills being paid on time? Has your mother signed a Durable Power of Attorney for Finances to allow someone to pay bills/sign checks? While we can help organize these financial issues and get files and papers ready for payment, we do not sign checks or actually pay the bills. We organize but do not execute!

While I live here in San Diego, my Dad lives in Chicago and needs help – can you still help me?

Age @ Home Elder Care Management works with the National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers – www.caremanager.org . We are active in the national organization, we know personally many of the care managers around the country, and we encourage people to use the NAPGCM to locate a care manager in the community where your parent lives. We will happily assist you in finding a care manager outside of the San Diego area if that is what you need.